Considering The Year Ahead, Life, Death And Photography

It would be impossible to think of the future without considering that there is the potential for me to die from heart disease. As you’re aware I have decided not to have surgery for my heart condition. I can see how dieing could be a scary experience, but I have been at peace since making this decision.

Knowing that I have a limited time left has most certainly helped me to focus on living well and considering whether my daily actions improve the quality of my life. This doesn’t mean running around like a mad march hare and doing, doing, doing. Sometimes I just want to sit still and do nothing, others I want to read or birdwatch, and occasionally I want to be around people.

I’m not used to being around people, and I can struggle even when I’m around those who I love and feel safe with. Getting the balance right for me isn’t easy, I’ve had a wonderful Christmas, but I’m ready to go home now.

When I return home my plan is to begin meditating daily. Meditation is most definitely linked to my creativity and photography. I have a few ideas for photographic project’s and I know meditation will help with developing these. I have vague ideas about making photos with others who identify as being non-binary or gender fluid, and making use of masks or props to explore and express gender identity.

I’ve particularly enjoyed my embroidered photography this year, for my project “Some Emotional States Of My Anorexia, And The Strengths Of My Recovery.” I completed the project just before Christmas, but I don’t feel ready to make these public at the moment. The wonderful thing is that I already have a gallery/arts project who would like to exhibit the series. I can see the potential for building upon this work to explore mental health further. Meditation will definitely aid my progress in these areas.

“Snippets” is a series I’m currently working on in which I write down snippets of overheard conversation and take a photo in the area of which the conversation was heard. I got the idea from a fellow OCA photography student Chloe Halstead. The idea is to have this as a long term project using my Huawei Mate 20 Pro, and to present the series as a photo book.

Hopefully I will also have some news about my application for a bursary to study an Open Foundation in Creative Writing, with the Open College of the Arts, I can feel some more photo essays coming along.

Colour is also going to feature in the clothes I wear, it’s time to bring more colour and variety into my attire, and today I’m top to bottom in yellow. I’ve also seen some green corduroys that I like. I’ll give them some thought.

I guess I’ll need to tone the colours down when birdwatching, something which I plan to do more of this year. I’m so grateful that I discovered RSPB Rainham Marshes. One thing that would aid my birdwatching would be finding a teleconverter that I can attach to the front of my Mzuiko 75-300mm lens. I can’t currently afford one. However, I have four photos appearing in The Loudest Whispers exhibition, run by The Arts Project London, during February, March and April. If they sell then I’ll be able to afford a teleconverter. Fingers crossed. 

I don’t have a bucket list, but I would like to be able to go on a birdwatching holiday during the summer.

Wishing you all a wonderful year ahead.

19 Replies to “Considering The Year Ahead, Life, Death And Photography”

  1. that is a wonderful plan Richard – full of variety and thoughtful too. Wishing you much success with all of it. I’m continually amazed at your enthusiasm for everything you’re doing and the challenges you’re taking on.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Happy New Year sir. I will be praying for your health. I also wanted to introduce you to an amazing blogger and friend of mine named Caralyn. Her blog is BeautyBeyondBones.com. She has a powerful testimony of her fight against anorexia. It is very encouraging! Blessings to you!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Thanks for sharing your experience. I have been meditating for over 10 years. It has changed my life and health in amazing ways. I got the into photography in 2019 because it is very similar to meditation when shooting pictures just to be in the moment. I look forward to see how meditation and the choice to embrace life in an organic way will change the way you see the world through your photos. Many blessings on your journey 🙏🏻.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thankyou so much. Meditation has without doubt improved the quality of my life over the years, but I’ve struggled with it since my mental health relapse over the summer. I look forward to getting back into a daily practice with it. And I completely agree about photography. It is mindfulness.

      Liked by 1 person

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